Where do the dead go when the spirits leaves our body that no amount of tears that we might shed profusely brings back our loved ones? The loved ones that we’ve spent almost all our lives with; the laughter, the pain, the makeup after a serious fight, and all of a sudden, it is all gone.
Death…. Whatever, he/or she must be, I hate it just because of the way he/or she had snatched my loved ones away from the backs of their mothers. I know that you must be wondering what is wrong with me right now for referring to death as he/or she. Believe me, death must be a man to be that stone heartless the way he is that he takes even the babies away from their mothers dripping milk breasts and from the birth canal.
The incident that shattered me most in my life beyond my grandmother’s death was that case of an adopted aunt who died at the age of thirty three at child birth, having her second child. In death’s own creation, he must had, been a man. Only a man does a resolute wickedness such as Death when their minds are made up!
Do you know what I found strange in all this my loved ones being taken from me unexpectedly? Is how they appear to me in my dreams when they are about leaving, this world. In my grandmother’s case, she appeared to me wearing a long white garment that was touching her toes. In the dream, she asked me to blow off a balloon for her. The moment I did, she was filled with joy smiling from one corner of her mouth to another. Then, a door opened behind her and closed in on her. Whatever, that meant, I should start crying, but something distracted me. Colorful balloons were all over the place suddenly, and I found myself basking in them filled with joy just like grand mum. The next morning….my grandma was dead! In Aunt Marian’s case, she was backing the infant upside down leaving the baby’s head dragging on her butt. She was moving from one house block to the next and she was smiling also. She actually called my name.
“Dammy, I just came to let you know I delivered a baby girl.”
I jumped up quite excited!
“I can’t wait to come perform.” But she didn’t wait to hear that. She was gone. I had been talking to the air.
She has always told me I would come perform with my band on the naming ceremony of her child and she would pay me. She just wanted people to know what I can do. How good I am. What a dream?! I was so rattled badly I jerked from sleep with terrible perspiration. The following morning, the news came to me that over the night she delivered the exact sex I saw her backing in the dream but that she died at child birth. She was losing so much blood after the baby had been delivered and the so called Doctor couldn’t do anything to stop it. Aunt Marian’s riches just couldn’t help at that point in time. Money became useless. Before they could get her to the general hospital, she gave up!
In my eight years old cousin’s case, I saw her bosom friend locked up in a big dark house, hands and legs, shackled. The afternoon of the day which followed the vision, my cousin went missing from school. It’s been eleven years now and we never saw her again.
In Mummy Eleanor’s case, she was eating dinner just like everyone else in the house was this faithful evening. Then suddenly, she swallowed spoonful rice thus the rice went through her nostril and into her head. And that was it! The next morning she had to be taken to the hospital. It was beyond swallowing food wrongly.
At exactly 12:00 PM that afternoon, even though it is so unlikely for me to sleep during the day, I found myself drifted to sleep very easily and her spirit came onto me in my sleep. I dreamed! In my dream, she was wearing a light cream iro and bubaa that was between white. She said to me that she was now healed and there wouldn’t be anything to worry about any longer. She prepared a fish stew, but she did not even allow the fish to cook in the stew for two seconds before she took one out of the fish and served it with stew less rice to a woman who is very close to her in the neighborhood.
I woke up! Told the dream to one of her nephews and I inquired if she was now talking. The sun went home and the lesser flame replaced it, it was night now. We were all laughing, watching movies even one of the kids in the house fought with a man in the neighborhood. But Eleanor aged mother wouldn’t share in our glee. Matter of fact, she didn’t taste water since morning that her daughter was taken to the hospital. She has stroke, but the stroke would not kill her even though she prays for death day in day out. She had lost one daughter before now. The young woman was Mummy Eleanor’s immediate younger sister. She died at child birth after delivering twins. Now, the old woman dreaded losing another child.
One thing I found amiss was that people were arriving one after another that night. But there was no sign of poignant grief on their faces. So I went on catching my fun.
Mummy Eleanor actually passed on a few minutes past twelve that afternoon and nobody said anything. The excuse was that they didn’t want anything that would make her mother be suspicious. That was a good a good excuse I told myself when the news came to me the following morning.
Why me? Why couldn’t this people reveal their death to me long before it happened so that I could run around and pray to God to help keep; them alive. I cannot understand why people should work; so hard in this life and wouldn’t have the chance to eat the labors of their hand because death came and took them away?
Eleanor Ajose, was a good wife, lover, mother, daughter and a good friend above all. We’ve shared the laughter and the pain. I have been this family, family friend for as long as I started breathing. Eleanor could never let you go on, unhappy with her for days, before she would call you and explain why she had acted the way she must had acted that made you feel terrible and wanna smash her head, then ask for your forgiveness.
I desire one thing that she had all through her days and this is LOVE! She and her husband were best of friends. He stood by her and told her how much he loved her till she closed her eyes in death. This day I am sure must had been marked out when they first met; just like the day they were saying ‘YES I DO’. When this couple had tiff, quarrel, they settle it in a way that made all of us laughed. They were such an adorable couple. I suppose he must be so lonely now.
Eleanor Ajose, I will miss you for the rest of my days. You were such a sweet mother. May your gentle soul, rest in the bosom of our Lord Jesus Christ.